Dealing with My Loss

It has been over a week since my feline fur pal Colin has passed and it has been hard. I can put on a happy face, but really, I have gotten upset quite a few times in the past 10 days.

Even still this morning when I got up from bed and quickly looked for him, he wasn't there.

When I got home last night I made sure to close the door really quickly so that a chill wouldn't get into the house by his bed, but the bed is also no longer there.

These are not events of great magnitude but just little reminders of how I cared for him and how he would care for me. He was usually the best one to comfort me when I was sad and now it feels a bit lonelier because I am sad at the loss of him. His presence is what made it all better so it isn't like I can just go to someone else, it is not the same.

I guess I should consider myself lucky. I have never dealt with the loss of a pet before, or really anyone that I have been close with for that matter... so this is how it is, huh? A small void has been left in my life that no one else knows how to fill, if it even can be filled. Maybe it isn't supposed to be. Isn't that what memories are?

I think life is like that, full of all these voids and then also fullness in other areas. Life is not a straight and linear path but more of a bubble diagram - closing of a door and opening a window so to speak. You don't ever get over it, you just get past it.

Still missing you, little guy. You were very loved.